This is what triggered this existential questioning: our boss has discovered his - previously unthinkable - people management skills and decided to get us all tested and charted using the MBTI (Myers-Briggs Type Indicator) method.

A few years ago, my sister worked at a company active in leadership management and they used MBTI in their workshops, so she'd already gotten me interested enough to try and find some free online tests at the time.

Well, there are loads of these test around, some more serious than others. I think I tried 4 or 5 different ones, like this one and this one (maybe I should mention I'm an online test junkie).

So, anyway, I took some tests and the result showed I was INFP.
An explanation of the different scales (I/E; N/S; F/T and P/J) can be found here.
But basically it means I'm a permanent resident of la-la-land. INFP's live in their own heads a lot, are constantly busy analysing emotions, collecting new information and delaying decision-making. When they do make decisions, they're gut-feeling based more than rational.

So, a couple of years later I was curious to see if the results of the serious, paid-for-by-my-boss test would be anything similar, and they were.

Of course, me being me, I began Googling like mad to find more information about my type, hoping I would find the answer to all my life questions in the results of this test. I guess I found a whole new series of questions instead.

On the up-side, I can pinpoint much more easily the things I actually really don't like about my current job (anything to do with planning, budgeting and arriving at work on time) and can see that it isn't just because I'm a lazy sloth, it's actually a perfectly logical characteristic of my personality type (how's that for a great excuse?).

But, I guess, more importantly, it's slowly helping me realise that there might just be jobs out there that don't feel like a constant struggle (and I thought that was just something you had to learn to accept - that's why it's called work, right?). Which is where the questions begin.

Question 1: How much faith can you put in a psychological test when you're making decisions that will determine the rest of your life? If the individual influences the result of the test, is it acceptable that the result of the test could influence the individual?

Question 2: How can I decide exactly what job is right for me? There's a world of difference - in my opinion - between becoming a writer, a counsellor, a musician or a priest. All of them are however recommended careers for INFP's.

Question 3: How can I be sure that I will enjoy this new career more than I enjoy what I'm doing now? Maybe the job isn't the problem, maybe it's all me. Maybe I'm just a negative person, a whining baby who will never really be satisfied with anything she does, will never really feel like getting up in the morning and never feel she's being paid enough for her precious time.

Question 4: What if this new career involves years of studies? Going back to university? Can I really consider that option? Should I try to find a short cut, and run the risk I won't be qualified enough? What if people don't take me seriously? What if the job would be ideal for me, but the people I'd have to work with are horrible? And why am I so scared to give it a try, when I've always been a risk-taker?

And all this time, I do have a new direction slowly forming in my mind. No idea how long it will last, though. I've been through so many career fantasies I've lost track: marine biologist, globe-trotting reporter, sexologist, psychologist, teacher, graphic designer, architect...

So, to become or not to become a trainer/coach/counsellor? And how do you go about it?

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