Smog is beautiful

This was the view from my place this morning before I left for work.
It looks so peaceful and pretty... amazing it's actually pollution that causes it to look that good, lol!

It feels so good that the days are getting longer again, tomorrow is the last day of the year and spring is just around the corner :)

2008 was a great year in so many ways, I hope 2009 will be a great year too.

On a brighter note

Some positive things:
- I lost another 1.1 kg last week. Total loss: 4.3 kg.
- I only have 5 weeks left at work before my new life begins (whatever that will turn out to be).
- I've started reading again (or rather continued after the holidays), even if right now it's just silly chick lit.
- I've used our new exercise bike 4 times since we bought it last Monday, despite it really really hurting my bum.
- I'm at work and the bosses are all on holiday. I'm gonna wrap up my invoicing for 2008, then go home. And tomorrow we're going out for xmas lunch with the other 7 colleagues who are working over the holidays, which means we will get absolutely no work done :).

Back at work and scary thoughts

I'm back at work and the place is full of chocolate and sweets! Argh! So far I've only had one sweet, and I am going to leave it at that, but this is going to take considerable willpower. I'm so bored at my job and such a procrastinator... eating is a way of putting off working, lol.

Tomorrow I have to go to the doctor's and get blood drawn to check for diabetes. I am so hoping it hasn't come to that. I would really hate myself if I have got it because of my weight being too high for too long. I mean, I know I'm doing something about it now, I just hope it isn't too late. The reason my doctor wants to check is this bloody foot injury that isn't healing, which apparently can be a sign of diabetes. :(

I did an online test once where you inputted all your data (age, weight, if you smoke, family history, where you live, what kind of job you do, what sports you do...) and it calculates your life expectancy. Being overweight actually takes 10 years off my life. Can you imagine? It was a really freaky test, cause I did it for my dad, giving his age in as 57 and it predicted he would die at 59, which is exactly the age he had died at a few years earlier (lung cancer). Ugh!

Anyway, all these health considerations are what is really pushing me to lose weight for good this time. I am more at risk for heart disease (number one killer for women), blod clots, diabetes, problems during pregnancy, certain cancers and a sh*tload of other things. I'm afraid of taking the plane when I should be much more afraid of the crap I put in my mouth every day.

Weird Christmas

What a strange xmas this year... I have basically been gagging for a big family get-together type xmas for months now, but it just wasn't meant to be.
First my sister and her boy were going to come over, but they couldn't afford the flights.
So I tried to get my cousin and his wife to come over but they had other plans.
So I (desperate by then) invited my in-laws over for xmas dinner, but they had some lame excuse about him not being able to drink if they had to drive all the way here, not being allowed to smoke in our place, and something about the dog.

Little sis (who's living with us) didn't want to commit to anything and decided she wasn't in xmas spirit this year anyway. So with neither my husband nor my sister caring much for any of it, I boldly went and got a xmas tree, decorated it and hung up some lights... but it's not much fun when you're only doing it for yourself.

Anyway, we ended up being invited to a friend's place, for xmas eve dinner with an assorted bunch of random people (her 2 kids, her brother, her grandmother, the neighbour's kid and us) which turned out to be a nice evening, with lots of presents and good food, just not really the big family thing I really wanted.

Yesterday I decided to go to church, it being the 4 year anniversary of my father's death. But the church was closed... oh well, I know it was a bit silly, I mean, why would I feel closer to him in church than anywhere else. But I guess I wanted to do something that would mark the fact I had been thinking of him.

For me, Christmas is all about sharing moments with the people you love. And without those people, it just loses its meaning. Of course there's Bart, but he doesn't have the xmas spirit so it really just feels like any other day. The best part of xmas this year has been phoning mum in New Zealand for 40 minutes (hello phone bill) and my sister in Shetland for another half hour and chatting away to my nephew who spent at least 10 minutes just reciting all the presents he got.

So today I'm not making any special xmas meal and I'm back on my diet (went just a bit over points yesterday) and we didn't exchange presents (except for my sister who got me Amelie Poulain on DVD). Our present to each other was an exercise bike, and I think Bart was more than happy to be off the hook for present duty this year. Tonight we'll be having thaï green curry vegetable and beef stir fry and going to bed early.

I'm really going to try and organise to get over to New Zealand for xmas next year and hopefully have some sort of family gathering, as it should be.

10 days in...

After the first 10 days on Weight Watchers I had my second weigh in this morning and have lost 2.2 kilos! Total so far: 3.2 kilos down.

Of course being sick and not having much appetite have helped, but apparently so did all the changes I've made to my eating patterns.

I really want to keep this up but I guess I'm afraid there will be those inevitable moments when I won't give a damn anymore, and then who knows what will happen...

But there is definitely a sense of relief that I have finally started at least.

Weight Watchers week 1

I have just completed my first week on Weight Watchers!
I am so happy to have finally found the inspiration to lose all this weight I have been carrying around for too long already.

I felt so good during our honeymoon in Mauritius, eating lots of fruit and veg, balancing out my meals and making healthy choices when faced with massive buffets of tempting foods, that I really finally understood I could do it.
The hardest part was thinking I'd been making healthy choices and eating all the right things, then coming home to find I'd put on 3 kg.

So I decided to join Weight Watchers Online and start counting points, a system I know works for me after doing it for 7 weeks in 2004 (that attempt aborted when my father became ill, then died 6 months later). I also think they're sensible, as opposed to every other fad diet out there.

Anyway, I chalk down most of the 3 kg I gained to water retention during the flight, cause we've been home 9 days and I've already dropped them again, which I don't think can be attributed solely to 1 week of WW and the flu...

Monday is my official weigh-in day, even though I started on a Saturday, so I'll wait till then to publish my official weekly result.

Motivation CHECK
WW subscription CHECK
Fitness bike CHECK (as of tomorrow)
Diet blog CHECK

This time I'm serious :)