Weird Christmas

What a strange xmas this year... I have basically been gagging for a big family get-together type xmas for months now, but it just wasn't meant to be.
First my sister and her boy were going to come over, but they couldn't afford the flights.
So I tried to get my cousin and his wife to come over but they had other plans.
So I (desperate by then) invited my in-laws over for xmas dinner, but they had some lame excuse about him not being able to drink if they had to drive all the way here, not being allowed to smoke in our place, and something about the dog.

Little sis (who's living with us) didn't want to commit to anything and decided she wasn't in xmas spirit this year anyway. So with neither my husband nor my sister caring much for any of it, I boldly went and got a xmas tree, decorated it and hung up some lights... but it's not much fun when you're only doing it for yourself.

Anyway, we ended up being invited to a friend's place, for xmas eve dinner with an assorted bunch of random people (her 2 kids, her brother, her grandmother, the neighbour's kid and us) which turned out to be a nice evening, with lots of presents and good food, just not really the big family thing I really wanted.

Yesterday I decided to go to church, it being the 4 year anniversary of my father's death. But the church was closed... oh well, I know it was a bit silly, I mean, why would I feel closer to him in church than anywhere else. But I guess I wanted to do something that would mark the fact I had been thinking of him.

For me, Christmas is all about sharing moments with the people you love. And without those people, it just loses its meaning. Of course there's Bart, but he doesn't have the xmas spirit so it really just feels like any other day. The best part of xmas this year has been phoning mum in New Zealand for 40 minutes (hello phone bill) and my sister in Shetland for another half hour and chatting away to my nephew who spent at least 10 minutes just reciting all the presents he got.

So today I'm not making any special xmas meal and I'm back on my diet (went just a bit over points yesterday) and we didn't exchange presents (except for my sister who got me Amelie Poulain on DVD). Our present to each other was an exercise bike, and I think Bart was more than happy to be off the hook for present duty this year. Tonight we'll be having thaï green curry vegetable and beef stir fry and going to bed early.

I'm really going to try and organise to get over to New Zealand for xmas next year and hopefully have some sort of family gathering, as it should be.